Atheist Humor


An atheist buys an ancient lamp at an auction, takes it home, and begins to polish it. Suddenly, a genie appears, and says, “I’ll grant you three wishes, Master.” The atheist says, “I wish I could believe in you.” The genie snaps his fingers, and suddenly the atheist believes in him. The atheist says, “Wow. I wish all atheists would believe this.” The genie snaps his fingers again, and suddenly atheists all over the world begin to believe in genies. “What about your third wish?” asks the genie. “Well,” says the atheist, “I wish for a billion dollars.” The genie snaps his fingers for a third time, but nothing happens. “What’s wrong?” asks the atheist. The genie shrugs and says, “Just because you believe in me, doesn’t necessarily mean that I really exist.
***
An Atheist dies and, to his surprise, finds himself met by St. Peter at the Pearly Gates.
St. Peter reviews the man’s record and tells him, “Well, even though you didn’t believe in any deities, you led a good, moral life. It is especially good that you did so without expecting any eternal reward. So we are going to let you into Heaven.
St. Peter then assigns an angel to take the Atheist on an indoctrination tour. During the tour, the Atheist sees Buddhists, Hindus, Muslims, other Atheists, and people of all religions. He also notices a high wall in a far corner of Heaven. When the tour ends, the angel asks him if he has any questions. The man asks, “What’s behind the high wall in the corner?
The angel replies, “That’s where we put the Christians. They think they’re the only people up here.”
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